The Delight of Being Ordinary Read online

  ALSO BY ROLAND MERULLO

  NOVELS

  Leaving Losapas

  A Russian Requiem

  Revere Beach Boulevard

  In Revere, in Those Days

  A Little Love Story

  Golfing with God

  Breakfast with Buddha

  American Savior

  Fidel’s Last Days

  The Talk-Funny Girl

  Lunch with Buddha

  Vatican Waltz

  Dinner with Buddha

  The Return

  NONFICTION AND MEMOIR

  Passion for Golf

  Revere Beach Elegy

  The Italian Summer

  Demons of the Blank Page

  Taking the Kids to Italy

  The Ten Commandments of Golf Etiquette

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2017 by Roland Merullo

  All rights reserved. Published in the United States by Doubleday, a division of Penguin Random House LLC, New York, and distributed in Canada by Random House of Canada, a division of Penguin Random House Canada Limited, Toronto.

  www.doubleday.com

  DOUBLEDAY and the portrayal of an anchor with a dolphin are registered trademarks of Penguin Random House LLC.

  Cover illustration by Shout

  Cover design by John Fontana

  LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA

  Names: Merullo, Roland, author.

  Title: The delight of being ordinary : a road trip with the Pope and the Dalai Lama / Roland Merullo.

  Description: New York : Doubleday, [2017]

  Identifiers: LCCN 2016027621| ISBN 9780385540919 (hardcover) |ISBN 9780385540926 (ebook)

  Subjects: LCSH: Self-actualization (Psychology)—Fiction. | Self-realization—Fiction. | BISAC: FICTION / Humorous. | FICTION / Literary. | FICTION / Religious. | GSAFD: Road fiction.

  Classification: LCC PS.E748 D45 2017 | DDC 813/.54—DC23 LC record

  available at https://lccn.loc.gov/​2016027621

  Ebook ISBN 9780385540926

  v4.1

  ep

  Contents

  Cover

  Also by Roland Merullo

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Epigraph

  Acknowledgments

  Author’s Note

  Day One

  Day Two

  Day Three

  Day Four

  Day Five

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  For my Exeter friends

  Bob Braile, Joanie Pratt,

  Wick Sloane, and David Weber

  and

  for Jason Kaufman,

  with thanks

  Let us ask ourselves today: Are we open to “God’s surprises”?

  —POPE FRANCIS

  It is my belief, for the world in general, that compassion is more important than religion.

  —THE DALAI LAMA

  God made so many different kinds of people. Why would he allow only one way to serve him?

  —MARTIN BUBER

  The gods, too, are fond of a joke.

  —ARISTOTLE

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  First thanks, as always, to my wife, Amanda, for her loving support, optimism, and steady compass in the sometimes difficult journey that is the creative life. My special thanks, also, to our daughters, Alexandra and Juliana, who brighten our home like sunlight and who inspire me every hour with their grace and wisdom.

  I would also like to express my gratitude to my good friend Peter Sarno, whose Revere sense of honor and humor buoys me; to Craig Nova, a fine writer, who lives the creative life with great dignity; to Jessica Lipnack, for many kind favors; to Dennis Holahan, for his support and wise counsel; to my fine editor, Jason Kaufman, who put so much extra effort into the development of this novel; to Zanny Merullo and Simone Gugliotta, for their invaluable help with the Italian language (any mistakes are my own); and to the other good people at Doubleday—Bill Thomas, Rob Bloom, Lauren Weber, Victoria Chow, Carolyn Williams, Patrick Dillon, Chris Jerome, Pei Loi Koay, Kevin Bourke—for their help in bringing this story into print.

  AUTHOR’S NOTE

  I am inclined to put my trust in spiritual figures who show a sense of humor, rather than those who take everything—including themselves—with a miserable seriousness. Life can be harsh, yes. The struggle to live a meaningful life, however we define that, can be rich with problems and challenges. But humor exists to soften the sharp edges of things. And so Pope Francis and the Dalai Lama, both of whom laugh a lot, seem to me like wise teachers, extraordinary men in the difficult position of guiding billions of followers, of steering vessels with a heavy cargo of good and bad history, in the same general direction, across the rough seas of modern life.

  It was in a spirit of respect and gratitude that I made them the central characters in this odd parable. They are human, and in order to make the story work I felt I had to show them as people, not figureheads. In doing so, I made use of various interviews, articles, and biographies. While trying to stay close to actual Christian and Buddhist doctrines I have taken a few small liberties. For instance, I don’t know that Pope Francis is actually afraid of heights, or that the Dalai Lama is actually afraid of water. My hope is that the reader accepts these fictional details in the spirit in which they were intended: respectful, well-meaning, provocative in the best sense, beribboned with strips of humor and the big life-and-death questions that are central to the lives of those men, and that have fascinated me since I was old enough to write a complete sentence.

  Day One

  1

  My name is Paolo dePadova—son of an Italian mother and an American infantryman father, and thanks to a peculiar combination of loyalty and luck I served, for a time, as First Assistant to my beloved cousin His Holiness the Pope of Rome. My tenure didn’t last long. In fact, my duties came to an end as a direct result of the story I’m about to tell here, a story the Pope himself asked me to make public when I felt the time was right. Parts of it will be familiar from headlines in the international news, but, as you might expect, those parts were sensationalized, tarnished by rumor, stained with misinformation. The heart of it, the essence, the real, full story, remains known only to a handful of people, myself included. I share it now in a spirit of reverence and compassion, but also in service to the truth. As my cousin liked to say, “Anche i papi sono uomini.” Which might be translated as “Popes are people, too.”

  2

  My odd story begins, oddly enough, with a Buddhist. Or, at least, with the visit of a famous Buddhist to the most sacred halls of Roman Catholicism. It’s common, of course, for a pope to receive visiting heads of state—presidents, prime ministers, first secretaries. Catholics have a great deal of clout in the world’s voting booths, and politicians, even the least religious politicians, like to make a papal pilgrimage. They sit for a photo op with the Pontiff, pretend to exchange ideas, make promises they never intend to keep, then fly back to their luxurious lives and seats of power.

  Popes, in my experience, handle these visits with an admirable patience. Disappointed again and again, they nevertheless always seem to hope that the leaders of the world will actually behave in ways that reduce the chance of war and give comfort to their poor.

  In the case of the Dalai Lama’s visit, however, the Holy Father had good reason for optimism. Here was a man whose responsibilities were similar to his own, and whose devotion to his faith and his pe
ople was beyond question. It was the second year of our joint tenure—the Pope’s and mine—and probably the three hundredth official visit. I was used to the frenzied preparations: security precautions, press conferences, interviews. But when I went to see the Pope that morning I could sense, almost immediately, that the Dalai Lama’s visit would not be typical.

  My cousin liked to rise at four, spend three hours in prayer, and then take a light morning meal. On Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays when he was in Rome, Giorgio—as my parents and I had always called him—asked that I have breakfast with him in his relatively humble accommodations: a three-room suite at the Domus Sanctae Marthae hotel in Vatican City. Seven a.m. sharp.

  This wasn’t easy for me. At seven in the morning I’m not yet at my best—not that my best is very good at any hour—but out of devotion to the famous man and in deference to his inhumanly busy schedule, I always showed up on time. In order to reach the papal chambers, even with my top-secret Vatican credentials, I had to run a gauntlet of security officials and various secretaries. After doing so on that morning I went, at last, along a familiar, carpeted corridor and tapped on a set of wooden doors twice my height.

  “Entra, cugino!” the Pope always yelled joyfully. Come in, cousin! That day it was no different.

  The velour curtains hanging from the windows of his dining area had been pulled aside and, even at that early hour, a golden sunlight poured through the glass. The Pope was dressed casually in dark pants and a white T-shirt, a medal of the Blessed Mother looped on a thin chain around his neck. As was his custom and preference, he was barefoot (he liked to say it linked him, however subtly, with the poor of this world). The sunlight fell on one side of his face, catching a smile so sincere and sparkling it would have caused the most devoted atheist to convert. He gave me the warmest of embraces. Another minute and we were sitting opposite each other at a small, marble-topped table. An aide brought a typical breakfast—pear slices, pots of herbal tea, two pieces of Belgian chocolate the size of bottle caps. (The Pope is famous for his sweet tooth.) We prayed over the food and began to eat, but, knowing him so well, I could see a rising tide of trouble, a splash of anxiety on the skin of his face.

  “What’s wrong, Your Holiness?”

  “Oh, stop it,” he said in his fake-gruff voice. “For the one thousandth time, Paolo, please and kindly call me ‘Giorgio’ or ‘Pope,’ anything but ‘Your Holiness.’ I’m not worthy of that title, and it’s like a wall between me and the cousin I love.”

  “Impossible, Your Holiness,” I said. “I’m a simple man. If I start calling you Giorgio in private, I’ll slip someday and say it in public.”

  “Sì, e poi?” Yes, and then?

  “And then my enemies will attack me, and attack you for hiring me.”

  “Yes, and then?”

  “Your judgment will come into question…and I’ll be out on the street.”

  It was all a joke, a comic routine. “You keep me sane, cousin,” the Pope liked to say. “Joke with me. Make me laugh. Remind me that I am, in fact, a human being, not a figurehead.”

  “Something’s bothering you, Pope,” I said.

  He smirked, looked sideways, chewed meditatively on a slice of pear. “I can no more hide my thoughts from you than I can hide my sins from God.”

  “What is it?”

  “How’s Rosa?”

  “Beautiful, intelligent, stubborn, rich, impossible to live with—which is why I no longer live with her. In short, the same as always. Don’t change the subject. What’s wrong?”

  “And your miraculous daughter, Anna Lisa?”

  “Fine, also, though I haven’t seen her in four months. She misses you. Rosa, for some reason, thinks Anna Lisa has a serious boyfriend. Now, tell me, what’s wrong?”

  More pensive chewing. A sip of tea. As was his habit—part of his ongoing battle with the demon of sugar—he broke one of the coins of dark chocolate in two and handed the larger piece to me. Another moment and out came the truth. “I have a confession to make.”

  “I’ll call Cardinal Forgereau, your confessor. Let me finish the meal and I’ll—”

  “Not that kind of confession, Paolo. You’re right. I’m troubled. I feel…lately I’ve been feeling, I don’t know…soffocato. Stifled. Constrained.”

  “Emotionally or spiritually?”

  “Both.”

  “Details, please.”

  He shook his head, frustrated. “I can’t describe it.”

  “Should we cancel today’s events? Say you’re not feeling well? The Dalai Lama and his entourage are here until tomorrow, we can still—”

  More headshaking. “It’s not that. I’m anxious to see him. I feel so badly about not meeting him when he was in Rome with the Nobel laureates. That was shameful and foolish of me. I listened to bad advice—a terrible weakness of mine—and now I want to make it up to him.” The Pope paused again, shook his head in small movements. For a moment he couldn’t seem to make eye contact, an exceedingly rare occurrence with this man. At last he looked up. “Could you do me a favor, cousin?”

  “Anything.”

  The Pope is from Argentina—everyone knows that—and his first language is Spanish, of course. But his parents—like my mother—were Italian-born, and so, in honor of our shared heritage and in deference to the traditions of the Church, we usually spoke Italian with each other. This had the added advantage of not arousing suspicion among my numerous enemies in the Vatican bureaucracy. With most of the Pope’s visitors, English was the preferred tongue. I’m fluent, thanks to my parents, but the Holy Father sometimes struggles, and he hesitated so long then, spent so much time placing another pear slice between his lips, chewing, swallowing, that I worried he couldn’t find the words in either of those two languages and would revert to Spanish, a tongue I habitually mangle and wreck. Another pause, and then, in an embarrassed way, he said, “I’ve been having very odd dreams, cousin. Ho avuto stranissimi sogni, cugino. I sense that God might be sending me messages, in a kind of code.” He paused again. His embarrassment—so rare—embarrassed me. I wanted to ask about the dreams, but I held my tongue. He looked away, looked back. He said, “Potresti creare un piano d’azione, cugino?” Could you put together a plan, cousin?

  “Certo, Holy Father. Of course. What kind of plan?”

  Another smirk of displeasure. More hesitation. Then: “If I wanted to, say…take an unofficial vacation…three days, four at the most…could you work out the logistics?”

  “Of course, Your Holiness. But anyone here could do that. Your travel office. One of the administrative assistants. People say John Paul used to slip away to Cortina d’Ampezzo to ski. It’s not hard to arrange such a thing, even with the security—”

  “But I would want it arranged in secret…to disappear for a few days,” the Pope surprised me by saying. He was still having eye-contact issues. Unprecedented. “I don’t want to go anywhere in that foolish bubble of a vehicle. It’s a cage. It separates me from my people. And I don’t want the bodyguards or the travel office to know about this. I don’t want anyone to know. You and I. Rosa, if she wants to come along. We could make a side trip to see Anna Lisa, go to certain other places I have in mind. Three or four days…You’re staring at me.”

  “I’m looking for signs of dementia, Your Holiness…with all due respect. Your face is probably the most famous face on earth. Certainly the most famous in Italy. And you and I are going to sneak away? And what? Ride the Autostrada, have lunch with my daughter, take a swim? This isn’t Buenos Aires. We’re not nine and fourteen anymore.”

  “It’s absurd,” he admitted. “You’re right, as usual.”

  A veil of sadness fell across his face. To cheer him, and really only to cheer him, I said (and I will forever take responsibility for this remark), “Maybe the Dalai Lama could come along. I’ll give some kind of knockout pill to the two security details, then spirit you both away.”

  The Pope’s smile illuminated the room like light from a second
sun. He took a sip of tea, washed it around in his mouth, swallowed, flashed the magnificent smile again, and then seemed to slip into the garment of his papal authority. I’d seen this before, hundreds of times, a magical transformation. He’d told me once that it was fine and good to be humble, but at some point, if you were, in fact, going to lead, you had to be comfortable using power. “Un piano d’azione, per favore.” A plan, please, he said, as if he hadn’t agreed, a few seconds earlier, that the whole idea was ridiculous. “Hypothetical but detailed. By dinnertime, if you would.”

  I went along with our little game. “I’ll have it on your desk by lunch, Holy Father,” I said.

  “No, no. Nothing in writing.”

  And even after hearing those words, even after registering the stern expression on his face, I was sure my cousin the Pope must be joking.

  3

  A year or so earlier, the Pope had declined to meet with the Dalai Lama, who’d been in Rome with the other Nobel laureates. That decision—thrust upon the Holy Father by advisors who were not cousins—was intended, it seemed, to placate the Chinese government. What, exactly, Chinese leaders have to do with international Catholicism I doubt any of those advisors could have said. Clearly they were afraid of some imaginary backlash that might damage their careers, and clearly it had been a mistake to listen to them, a mistake born of inexperience. The Pope himself admitted as much to me. Since then, however, he’d grown bolder and more sure of his own judgment. In fact, as time passed, he seemed to care less and less what anyone thought of him. His global warming encyclical; his dressing down of the Curia at the annual Christmas address; his comments about not wanting Catholics to “breed like rabbits”; his secret diplomacy in the interest of rehabilitating U.S.-Cuba relations; his critique of what might be called “supercapitalism,” an evil mutation of a good system—as he grew into his role, the Holy Father became as fearless and provocative as Christ. Though he still sometimes fell prey to manipulative advisors, he’d recently made a big show of publicly praising the Dalai Lama, and then inviting him to visit. Almost as if he were doing penance.